meet the friends

spending time with friends never fails to make me happy. last night, i met up with my college friends and my newfound friends (my boyfriend's clique) somewhere far from kissing couples dressed in red.

almost a year after graduation, my college friends and i still find ourselves reminiscing about college--how easy it was compared to work (although when we were still in college, God knows how much we lamented over Philo papers, graded recitations, long exams... the list is endless), and how laid-back the lifestyle was (I can hear Howie in my head saying, "watsup, blockmates? just chillin'?") oh well, isn't it always that way? that everything in hindsight seems to be less end-of-the-world-like as we saw it then.

i remember in college, i often told myself, "just let this day pass, and i'll be alright," or "i hope when i open my eyes, this hell week's going to be a thing of the past..." and now i think of all those hell weeks i survived (and yes, we did look like we've been to hell and back with those dark circles under our eyes, signalling to our professors how badly we crammed the night before), all the papers i wrote (some while pretending to listen to another professor), and all those recitations where i silently prayed to all the angels and saints that, "please let me be called next time when i'm more prepared," (although i believe the phrase, more prepared, never got to be internalized...acted out, maybe, but never internalized...hehe). i think of all these and just end up thinking, "i loved college...everything about it: the people, the bench, the fact that when you say blue and white it's not just Mama Mary that pops in your head but a school that's given us another identity: the Atenean...ahhhh....i just loved everything about it...

but i guess, amidst the hustle and bustle of student life, it's the friendships that i formed that has brought me down the sentimental lane...and i figured, these people know me in ways that other friends i have can only imagine...and it is likewise with my high school friends who have their own college barkada...
i'm thinking that perhaps there is a sort of exclusivity when it comes to having friends...you have college friends, high school friends, friends from work, and God knows from where else...but the point is, different sets of friends, different experiences, and of course, different levels of friendship...

so when i was with my boyfriend's own barkada, i wasn't thinking that i had to be closey-closey to them (not that this is in my nature) if only for the need to fit in. i saw that there existed a certain history in the way they dealt with each other, the way they reminisced about their own experiences together, etc...and it's actually fun to be the new girl, like outside looking in...kind of gives me access to a past i wasn't previously privy to...like being let in on a secret without pressuring the other party to spill the beans...

anyway, his friends are great...one i caught eyeing us and said she was kilig and thought we were a cute couple...hehe...nobody said that about us before...i think they're happy for him, just like how friends should be happy for a friend who's found happiness (did that make sense?)...so if i make him happy, then i'm happy, too...oh dear, i think i've never used the word happy as frequently as i just did...what the heck, i love the guy..so sue me...

friends...old ones, new ones...a psych exam i took in college showed that i only consider a few people as friends (i'm a character...i choose only those who can stand me)...it probably is true..but for those i call friends, it doesn't matter how many times we talk about the same boring things (or people), how many times we pretend to look for a place to eat yet end up at starbucks...at the end of the day, i guess what's more comforting is the fact that the concept of forever makes sense when i say, "friends forever..."